Thursday, June 30, 2011

Flying Ants!

I am soooo way more tired than you right now, yet I can't fall asleep.  I am functioning at the level of zombie.  My hemoglobin is really low, which means I get tired very easily and any physical activity like walking up and down stairs, is a tragedy.  But my sister is really understanding. Like when she came with me to Toxin Tuesday this week and I had to take a break after walking up the parking garage steps and she said, "Maybe you should try walking on the treadmill everyday or something." Yes, I should.  Would you like to scrape my body off the treadmill belt (thump, thump, thump) when I'm done?

So it is always an adventure when my sister and I are together, obviously.  We get to the treatment center and find a cozy recliner, only to find out we shouldn't put our bags on the floor.  Ew! What?!? There is an ant infestation, but the exterminator is on his way. Shhhh.  Ok, this is weird.  Well, I don't see any ants on the floor......oh wait, yes I do. Are those dead flying ants? Yikes! We are being attacked by flying ants. Oh no! The gentlemen in the next chemo pod found one on his shoulder!  Where is the exterminator? Oh, he's not coming, the environmental guy from the hospital needs to come take a look around.  He must know something about flying ants that we don't.  Hmm, yes he definitely looks like he knows more about ants than I do. Now they want to fit 12 chemo patients, already hooked up to IVs, to a room that can only hold 4 patients.  It would be like watching "The Invasion of the Body Snatchers", all these bald chemo patients rolling their own travel IV bags emerging from chemo pods instead of pea pods, oh, as the fat asian environmental guy swats at flying ants in the background.

Getting treatment with dead flying ants surrounding you somehow does not seem sterile........

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Cheeyas!

Let's all give cancer a big FUCK YOU! It's been 3 years and a day since I received the greatest gift from God.

BAHAHAHA......just kidding, that's what older cancer 'survivors' say who hope, endure and pray. You know the ones I'm talking about, they wear pink ribbons.

Sorry I didn't post this on my actual 'cancer'versary (yikes, who says that?) but I was...drinking. a lot. That is what young cancer 'survivors' do; drink, dance and drink some more. And then some more dancing.